God’s love,
forgiveness, healing, and being able to move on—that’s what confession should
bring.
June’s Awakening, Day 18
You may
occasionally find yourself in the predicament of a heavy heart that feels
burdened to confess a sin to a trusted individual. Perhaps you are unable to
contact a person you’ve wronged or perhaps that person is unwilling and
unreceptive to any discussion. Here are some steps to help guide you in the
proper direction to release your burden.
Giving a Confession:
Preparation—you should always take
it to God first and fully accept His forgiveness and assurance, and if you are
led to confess the wrongdoing to another person, prayerfully seek God’s
direction. You are always secure in Christ.
Self-examination—seek, find, and
reflect upon what the Holy Spirit is guiding you specifically to do to resolve
the burden in your heart.
Perception—all sin involves denial
and you must fully understand, embrace, and overcome that. Sin, by its very
presence, seeks to hide itself and distort the truth. We must spiritually
perceive sin through the eyes of God and the one we’ve wronged. This is all
about fixing you, not fixing the other person.
You
hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see
clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. Matthew 7:5
NIV
Ask the why
and what—ponder how the sin came about and what were the effects, since
oftentimes sin is tied to underlying unmet needs, unresolved issues, or wrong
attitudes or perceptions. All these must be addressed appropriately or we will
inevitable continue down the same cycle of sin.
True sorrow—essential to repentance,
this is the motivating force to cease from those actions or behaviors. True
sorrow means taking on the pain of the one wronged and of God that resulted
from your actions.
Determination to avoid sin—must take
place by the changing of attitudes, intentions, and behaviors and resolving to
become better.
Grace—fully accepting and living in
the reality that His grace and forgiveness is sufficient for every sin and He
remembers it no more as we have been obedient to follow His confession directives.
The healing process has begun and we can confidently move on, even though it
may take time for full mending to take place.
Receiving a Confession:
If you are
spiritually mature possessing the highest of noble character and integrity, you
may find others coming to you to release their burden and confess a sin. Here
is how you should properly prepare yourself to receive that and help mend the
heavy heart of another.
Preparation—you must prepare your
heart and mind to possibly receive very shocking and disturbing information.
You are not to judge but to only be a conduit to God. Everything must be in the
strictest of confidence.
Listen—truly this is your sole
purpose, not to overly comment or give advice or pass judgement or question.
You are to listen as a neutral observer being attentive and with appropriate
body language and facial expressions of encouraging neutrality.
Discern—let them completely finish
talking and do not interject. If they stop and pause for a few moments and are
looking at you inquisitively, simply say, “Yes, continue, I’m listening,” to
help them feel comfortable in finishing.
Filter everything through the Cross—always
be attentive, waiting appropriately as they may need, and filter the person,
their emotions, and everything you hear through Christ on the Cross.
Continual silent prayer—inwardly,
silently, and imperceptibly you are sending prayers of God’s love and
forgiveness into them. Pray that they strongly feel Christ’s presence, realize
what changes they may need to undertake, and are assured of His love and
forgiveness and begin the healing process to move on.
Pray, don’t counsel—when they are
finished, pray out loud just what you have been praying silently as the Spirit
prompts you. Do not condone nor condemn nor counsel. Just pray.
Announce—be sure to announce
assuredly in your prayer that God’s forgiveness is theirs and they are cleansed
of the wrongdoing and are free to turn from that event and move on.
Hands on—oftentimes an appropriate
light touch with the fingertips on a shoulder or the forehead can be a powerful
sensation as you pray that Christ Himself is touching them now with His love
and forgiveness and healing. Yes, we must always be cautious and use
discernment, but this light touch is immensely powerful as you are the conduit
of Christ’s presence.
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